Dissociating – A Poem

I wrote this poem to describe what it’s like to dissociate (WordPress is not letting me space it correctly):

I don’t feel right.

Something inside of me.

It’s not there.

I’m not with it.

But that’s a good thing.

Because the pain is not there.

It doesn’t hurt anymore.

Finally I’m free.

But I’m not there.

I’m not in my body,

I’m just somewhere.

People are talking.

I can hear them.

I can respond.

I tell them I’m not okay.

I don’t know what to say.

I’ll come back someday.

Maybe tonight,

But not today.

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White Dress

I wrote this poem about a month ago, but forgot to post it. I call it white dress:

I was once that girl

in the white dress.

I was once that innocent

Now I’m that girl

in the black dress.

Torn and shattered.

I lost my innocence.

Now I’m that girl

She’s been tortured.

Now I’m that girl

She stood strong.

But she’s not that girl

In that white dress anymore.

Courage

I wrote an uplifting poem:

You told me I couldn’t tell a word.

I told.

You told me I was weak.

I left.

You took my self-esteem  away from me.

I stole it back.

You violated my body.

I reclaimed it.

You made me hate you.

But I don’t hate.

You will never take one thing away.

You will never take away my courage!

I wanted to run

I write poems from time to time. This is a poem I wrote today:

I wanted to run and hide.
I wanted to for a long time.
Maybe I didn’t know,
Because you got into my mind.
But one day I learned
Who you truly are.
You’re a monster,
You’re an abuser.
I wish I could’ve known.
I wish I could’ve shown
That way I could escape your spell.
Now I’m scared
Scared for my life.
You can’t have that though.
You can’t take my life.